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TheREALFlyDog

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About TheREALFlyDog

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  1. TheREALFlyDog

    Kickoff Stolen

    File a charge back with your bank/credit card/PayPal, mate. Sorry the postal bandits killed your joy.
  2. TheREALFlyDog

    Stave X Windle

    It started as a joke of me threatening the mighty Moose Jaw meta with Stave/Windle slash fic. And then I remembered I'm friends with an Illustrator. Spigot and Friday ain't the only players with secret liaisons, eh? An old hand and a young buck. When their eyes met from across the pitch, it was like an Exploding Barrel in their hearts. Would their desires stay unresolved, or would they Stop Slacking and take a huge risk together? Stave X Windle.
  3. It was expected to be a bloodbath for the ages. In a lonely field in the middle of nowhere Butcher and Brewer alike were lined up for a rowdy exhibition match for the teeming masses. As Tapper, Master Brewer and Ox, The Owner, strode onto the pitch both sides were baying for blood. Tapper flanked by the fierce brawler Hooper, Spigot waving about a broken bottle, and the foul cat Scum with a face full of hate and a belly full of children's tears. Ox lining up with his murderous associate Boar, Boiler the innocent lad with a penchant for bloodletting, and Princess the most marketable mascot save for Salt. What was supposed to be an express train to tbe Smackdown Hotel instead turned into a gross display of footballing acumen. Princess runs up to kick the ball up as she's been trained. Spigot sensing an opportunity takes the ball, tripping and bouncing the poor pooch to the delight of the Brewers faithful. The drunken striker sending a hot goal bouncing off the Butchers goal. As the crowd goes wild Spigot stumbles back to the friendly lines. He turns to the crowd, pointing out which maidens will receive his victorious seed that evening he's blindsided. Ox, having received the ball from the fans on a toss-back, launches a vicious haymaker into Spigot's charming face. The crowd loses their poop as Ox pummel into the Brewer legend and responds with a goal of his own. The ball flies through the air as the Master Brewer senses a chance to end the game here and then. The quicker this ends, the quicker he and his mates get out of this unremarkable backwater and back to civilisation. Beer, wenches, and the chance to throw back Esters' poor performance in the exhibition series against the Blacksmiths in her stupid puffy face were before him. Tapper snaps the ball with his mash paddle. The concession at the pitch must have watered the ale down as the ball landed from the toss-back with unusual precision. Dribbling the ball in his feet he runs forward, and launches the still prone Princess across the pitch with a vicious golf swing. Momentum firmly in his side Tapper prepared to launch the goal to seal the deal. Spigot was a drunken lout who vomited and pissed blood in equal amounts on the practice pitch, but the man was still a goddamned legend. Tapper felt the rush of playing with one of the greats swell in his legs as he made the kick. The ball sailed, pinged off the goal, and was scored. With the blow of the referee's whistle the match ended. Butcher versus Brewer, and save for a small dribble from Spigot's nose, no blood was spilt. The fans had no idea what the hell they'd just witnessed. They had come for blood, and received a game of football instead.
  4. TheREALFlyDog

    Regale me with your cool stories!

    The dumbest thing ever was Mash How'Zats, I think Greyscales. It's been awhile. He then walks up to where Boar was, and rocks off another How'Zat on the old man. An activation later, Stave throws an Exploding Barrel, and Greyscales is still in the zone. 12" of movement while flat on your ass is none to shabby, eh? My finest Scum movement was when my opponent had a fuckpile of INF on Hammer. He had a great activation planned with the cocky new buck. Scum charges in on a Sic'Em. Hamstring, and a few points of DAM and pushes from the remaining attacks. Now, with the Hamstring there's only one thing he can reach. A 5 DEF cat, and nothing else.
  5. TheREALFlyDog

    Let's Bring Decimate Home, Laddies!

    The Union in Chains is upon us, my fellow Drunks. And I for one am down for embracing #TeamDecimate. With access to Besters' songs or Tapmaster 5000's Commanding Aura, we've got potential for a quick moving killing machine, who's a decent baller. Anatomical Precision and Commanding Aura. Together. If you're not stiff or frothing down below at that, you don't have a beating heart in your chest. Besides, the Masons wanting her is good enough to take her as our own. Let's bring Decimate home, to the stablest Guild in all the realm.
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